How to Ruin Date Night in 3 Verses: The 381st Greatest Song

 

As the story goes, the angel-voiced Aaron Neville was a longshoreman when he recorded the sweet-but-direct plea for a truthful love relationship, "Tell It Like It Is."

That dichotomy between a slow R&B ballad and the rough and tumble life of a longshoreman seems to have affected the effect of the record. Neville is quoted as saying, "A lot of people come up to me and say, 'That song got me and my wife together, and others say, 'It broke me and my wife up. '"

I looked up the words of the song, and I've gotta say, I'm on Team Breakup. Check it out:

If you want something to play with

Go and find yourself a toy

Baby my time is too expensive

And I'm not a little boy

I mean, doesn't he sound a little confrontational and demanding?

And what's this thing about his time being expensive? Is he a high-end gigolo?

If you are serious

Don't play with my heart

It makes me furious

Heads Up: If anger management is an issue for this guy, put on your high-heeled sneakers and run. a. way!

I believe you love me

Forget your foolish pride

In other words, don't listen to what your heart is telling you. Listen to me! I say you love me, so start acting like it!

Ah yes...nothing says romance like "you love me because I said so."