All This, and Yet I Am Not a Scrabble Champion

 

While playing a well-known crossword-creation game online, I was amused, and perhaps slightly nauseated, when I looked at my available letters and saw "LINTPIE".

Although the thought of consuming such a concoction certainly killed my appetite, it brought to life a string of thoughts, so I LEPT IN and called a TIP LINE.

I had just stabbed my mouth with my fork, so I was suffering from TINE LIP and couldn't really carry on a conversation. Instead, I fastened a TILE PIN to my shirt and tried to start a campfire...but I couldn't get the PINE LIT.

I was going to burn my mortgage, but since I couldn't get the fire going, I just stood there and stared at a LIEN PIT.

Trying to redeem my time, I cleared my hair of louse eggs until I had a nice little NIT PILE.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: The 371st Greatest Song

The Who's very first single spent a mere two weeks on the March 1965 charts and only made it to Number 93.

Musically, it feels suspiciously like "You Really Got Me" by The Kinks (maybe because both songs were produced by the same guy). So much so, Dave Davies of The Kinks says that when he heard "I Can't Explain," he thought those "cheeky buggers" from The Who were copying them.

According to Songfacts.com: The Who guitarist Pete Townshend wrote this song when he was 18 years old. He described it as being about a guy who "can't tell his girlfriend he loves her because he's taken too many Dexedrine tablets."

And yet, Rolling Stone considers it the 371st greatest song of all time.

I can't explain why.

And the Clean Plate Award Goes To...

 

Beloved and I were spending a day with LittleMan and Goober (our two youngest grandchildren) and thought it would be a treat for the 2-year-old LittleMan to have a Happy Meal for lunch.

He was very excited to get his McNuggets, fries, and apple juice. Several fries and all the juice were quickly consumed, but the chicken nuggets seemed to hold no interest for him. Soon, he was just sitting there staring.

I asked, "Are you going to eat your chicken nuggets?"

He grabbed the remaining fries from his plate and set them on the table. Then, one by one, each McNugget was placed there, too.

LittleMan proudly proclaimed, "I all done!"

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

Honestly, I admire the confidence. Maybe I should try this as a diet plan.

Observed Absurdities™ 73 - Are You Coming or Going?

 

Beloved and I had just enjoyed a south-of-the-border repast, paid our bill, and were caught up short when attempting to actually...you know...LEAVE the establishment.

Being unsure whether to trust American Express or Pepsi, this post has been uploaded from a small Mexican restaurant in Lakeville, Minnesota.

The Most Unfortunate Insect Metaphor in Rock History

 

"Hey, Siri, what is Rolling Stone's 372nd greatest song of all time?"

"'Marquee Moon,' by Television."

"How high on the Billboard charts did it go?"

"'Marquee Moon,' by Television, was never released as a single and was never listed on any airplay or sales chart."

"Did Rolling Stone give any reason for why they put it on the Greatest Songs list?"

"Not at all. Here's the blurb they connected to it: "Marquee Moon" is Television's guitar epic, stretching out for ten minutes of urban paranoia. "I would play until something happened," Verlaine said."

As if "urban paranoia" wasn't enough to keep me from even listening to this, the first line of the oft-repeated chorus puts a kink in my colon:

Life in the hive puckered up my night

The nicest thought this brings to mind is that a bee accidentally sucked up lemonade instead of honey.

Ewww...

Stuph That Has No Reason Being in My Head, Vol. X

 

The television series Castle, though firmly set in New York City, was filmed in Los Angeles.

The Archies (a cartoon musical group created for a television show) had a huge hit with the song "Sugar Sugar," which was originally offered to The Monkees (a human musical group created for a television show).

From my GPS while driving in Las Vegas: "At the light, turn right on Mel Torme Way and then turn left onto Sammy Davis Junior Avenue."

Somehow, the word horrified ought to have something to do with prostitutes.

The hashtag symbol (#) is called an octothorpe.

The King of Hearts is the only king in the deck without a mustache.

A single strand of spaghetti is called a spaghetto.

Crows hold funerals and gather together to mourn the passing of dead crows. Kind of ironic, considering that a group of crows is called a murder.

Reindeer eyes turn blue in winter for better low-light vision.

♫♪ Gimme dat ding

Gimme dat, gimme gimme dat

Gimme dat ding

Gimme dat, gimme gimme dat

Gimme dat ding

Gimme dat, gimme gimme dat

Gimme gimme gimme dat ding ♪♫

Marco SansPolo vs The Bunnies: A Cautionary Tail

 

Marco SansPolo (MSP), the relatively tiny, rat-like creature that passes for a dog in the Roth Haus, got uncharacteristically active the other day. He went all "My Ancestors Were Wolves!" on a pair of baby bunnies in our back yard.

One bunny was rendered bloody, immobile, and breathing in shallow gasps, leaving me the inglorious task of putting him out of his misery. The second seemed not so much injured as just frozen in fear.

When I bent down to give Bunny Number Two a closer look, she scampered away and, perhaps thinking it was a tunnel to a land devoid of giant bloggers, ran into an empty flower pot that was resting on its side. It was a small flower pot, but the rabbit kept working her legs as if still running away, even though her head was firmly pressed against the bottom of the flower pot.

That's when the single egg that hadn't been found by the grandkids on Easter popped out of the pot.

Beloved and I tried to be sad for the plight of the bunnies, but we couldn't stop laughing for a good two minutes.