With a little luck, some of these just might get printed for real.
Last-minute Candidate with Brains and an Actual Moral Compass Wins Write-in Campaign for the Presidency
Longmire Returns to Television with a 5-year Contract
All Music Recorded in the 21st Century Mysteriously Disappears
The Health Benefits of Kale Revealed as a Hoax
It Is No Longer Fashionable to Broadcast One's Sexual or Gender Proclivities
Supreme Court Rules That Yelling Does Not Make Your Stupid Theory Correct
Usage of "Should Of" Instead of "Should've" or "Should Have" Results in Large Fines
Waste-of-Ink Comic Strip Fred Bassett Finally Shuts Down #FredBassettMustDie
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