Thursday, March 20, 2008

50 Ways IV

8. Give a health-care gift card.
The idea here is that, instead of a blouse or a tie, you could give someone you care about a gift card good for paying healthcare costs. What is the deal with U. S. News & World Report? This is suppose to be a list of 50 ways to improve MY life in 2008...how does paying for someone else's healthcare make my life better? I'll tell you what, it definitely made my life worse when I gave my sister a membership in Weight Watchers. And now that I've read Way No. 7, I should have stuck with my first idea of a box of chocolates.

9. Dump your prescription pills safely.
Yeah...like down your throat...the way the doctor told you to.

10. Get screened for an STD.
Nothing good on TV? You've watched every DVD in your collection 87 times? Still too cold and sloppy to go to a park? Then stave off your boredom with this nifty little tip. For fun on the run, there's just nothing like it. (Serious side note: this tip wouldn't be necessary if we followed God's plan for our sexuality and kept it to ourselves until the safe, committed relationship of marriage. I'm just sayin'...)

11. Find a book worth talking about.
Step one: find a book worth reading.

12. Change your reading habits.
This tip could have been written by any of the current presidential hopefuls. It says nothing about whether your current reading habits are good, or whether they're working for you...just change them! Make them different! Change is good.

Whoa...I'm starting to sound like a grumpy old man. I think I need a change.

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