Tax Facts-ish

 

The Infernal Revenue Service has a lot of power it can wield in its unflagging effort to extract from the citizens of the U. S. of A. enough funds to keep the government well-stocked in pork barrels and erasable tape.

One of the IRS's superpowers is the ability to do its dirty work completely in the shadows, undetected by mere mortals. They can keep a secret better than Cher's plastic surgeon.

For instance, did you know...

• The IRS doesn't really know how much money anyone owes. They just throw out random numbers, trusting in the average citizen's lack of expertise.
• IRS agents are all participants in the witness protection program.
• 27% of all tax returns are tear-stained.
• Who gets audited is decided by a complex algorithm involving gross income, submission date, and Twitter followers.
• Tax money submitted after the deadline is used to buy lottery tickets...or thrown away...not that there's any difference.