Friday, May 16, 2014

Same Difference

Beloved and I recently spent a week back home again in Indiana, staying in the lush resort known as My Folks' Place.

It's always an interesting experience hanging out with SweaterGal and FlatulenceKing. They're both well into their eighties, with FK about to move on to the next decade. The television is almost always on, almost always twice as loud as is comfortable, and almost always tuned to either a Cubs game or RFD-TV, home of Hee Haw reruns, country music showcases, and farm reports from every state in the union.

One particular show was full of reports from Texas and was creatively titled, The Texas Report. I'm not sure what kind of screening/audition process it takes to become a correspondent on The Texas Report, but I'm thinking it can't be very rigorous.

Case in point: my proofreader's blood nearly boiled and my editing sense of justice actually snapped when I heard an explanatory sentence begin with these words:

"I equivalate it to..."

"I equate it to" or "It is the equivalent of"...one or the other...but not both, okay? This is the verbal equivalation of coming to a fork in the road, not knowing which path to take, and running into the tree in the middle instead.


I would have made a smart-alecky complaint call to the station if I hadn't been so busy laughing derisively.

...and then SweaterGal told me to warsh my hands before supper.

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