Friday, July 20, 2018

The Other 5 of My Top 10 Albums


In spite of not being challenged to rise up to the 10 Albums Challenge, I've challenged myself. This is the second half of that...so here they are...five albums, in no particular order, that have impacted me.


BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER
SIMON AND GARFUNKEL

This album contains the highest concentration of awesomeness S&G ever produced. I love singing along with every song; from the quiet introspection of "Only Living Boy in New York" to the put-the-top-down, crank-it-up fun of "Baby Driver".


WELCOME TO PARADISE
RANDY STONEHILL

This is one of the first "Jesus Music" albums I ever purchased. I've got his signature on my copy and his phone number in my contact list. Doesn't make me better than you, but it makes me feel that way. Personal History:  EngineerBob and I once convinced an audience that we were making up "Lung Cancer" on the spot...and the crowd went wild.


NEVER PICTURE PERFECT
RICH MULLINS

I suppose most Mullins fans would name a liturgy, a legacy, and a ragamuffin band as the album they would put on a list like this, and I almost did, but this one wins out for me because of "Bound to Come Some Trouble" and a song that amazes me because it is very personal for Rich, but also tells the story of my own family, "First Family".

DON McLEAN
DON McLEAN

Say what you want about "American Pie" and "Vincent" (neither of which are on this album), this project has the strongest line-up of any of McLean's albums. And when you find someone else who loves "Bronco Bill's Lament", or can sing along with you when you break into "On the Amazon", you've found a friend for life. Personal Gripe: The compilation CD, Legendary Songs of Don McLean, has a bunch of covers McLean recorded and misses out featuring songs from this album actually written by this musical poet.

TEASER AND THE FIRECAT
CAT STEVENS

I probably bought this album because of "Morning Has Broken" and "Peace Train", but I practically wore out the grooves on it. There isn't a "filler song" in the bunch. Explanation for the Young Ones in the Crowd: Vinyl records actually have grooves in them (Of course, now that I think about it, each record only has ONE groove per side.) that, when a special needle is placed in them and the record spins around, jiggle the needle  -  creating electrical impulses that recreate the sounds of musical instruments and the human voice that were played and sung into microphones in a recording studio thousands of miles and tens of years away. In other words, it's magic.

And yes, I realize that ever since the advent of the scritch-scratching DJ, vinyl records have been making a comeback and the Young Ones probably don't need the above explanation. Harumph. Be quiet and get off my lawn!

Friday, July 13, 2018

10 Albums...Well...5


It wasn't as popular as the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, but it was a whole lot less likely to cause a heart attack.

I'm talking about the "10 Albums" phenomenon that swept  -  make that quietly seeped  - through FacePlace and other antisocial media platforms a couple months ago. It went like this: "10 albums in no particular order. Albums that have made an impact and are still on your rotation list. Post the cover, no need to explain, and nominate a person each day."

I've grown tired of waiting for someone to nominate me (and also a little depressed that no one has), so herewith is the first half of my ten.


And while there may be no NEED to explain, this isn't an artsy-fartsy photoblog, you know...

SONGS O' SAD LAUGHTER

I've included this one first because I wanted to make sure it didn't get crowded out by anything else. Eric is the Musical Director of, and a performer in, the Dakota Chautauqua and I am blessed to call him a friend.  I am also blessed that he gave me this album of his several years ago. Don't Miss: "Chickens"; "La Bella Luna"

JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR
TIM RICE & ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER

One of my four free albums from when I joined the Record Club of America in the early 1970s, I would sing this in my head to help me get through a boring shift at McDonald's. Personal Favorite: "Gethsemane

GODSPELL
ORIGINAL CAST

Closely associated with JCS because of content and release dates, these songs stick a lot closer to Scripture and my heart. A 1978 production of this musical in Fort Wayne, Indiana, is where Beloved and I met. Fun Fact: My solo was "We Beseech Thee," which got cut from the movie version. #NotFair

SGT PEPPER'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND
THE BEATLES

It's practically a cliche to include this album on a list like this, but cliches are cliches because they are so often so true. Pet Peeve: After decades of telling everyone that "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" referred to a drawing by Julian Lennon, Paul McCartney, in the documentary epic Anthology, just off-handedly and with no sense of it being Breaking News says "of course that was about LSD."

SMELL THE COLOR 9
CHRIS RICE

There's a boatload of great songs on this album, and that's certainly swell, but seriously...just the cleverness of the title song is enough to make me ignore the strangeness of the cover. Chris Rice Gets Extra Points: He used to be a youth pastor. He's my kind-o-people.

-  -  But Wait! There's More!  -  -

Tune in next week for the other five of my top ten.


Friday, July 6, 2018

High Calorie Hits of the 1970s


Hey, guys and gals, here's all the best sounds for puttin' on the pounds!



Ribs Over Troubled Water  -  "I want my baby back, baby back, baby back..."

The Long and Winding Spaghetti  -  "...that leads to my mouth."

Bake It With You  -  Perfectly appropriate song for a band named Bread

One Baked Apple  -  "One baked apple don't spoil my appetite"



I Feel the Earth Move  -  "I feel the earth...move...whenever he steps; it's like a T-Rex doing...jumping jack reps"

American Pie  -  "A long, long time ago...I can still remember...how my mama made desserts"

Bennie and the Jet-Puffed Marshmallows  -  "She's got a fire outdoors...plans to make some s'mores"



Billy, Make Me a Hero (Sandwich)  -  "...with fries on the side"

Sister Golden Corral  -  The group America had a big hit with this song about a nun who ate exclusively at a buffet franchise.

50 Ways to Cleave Your Loaf  -  Paul Simon's fattest song since Parsley, Sage, Rosemary & Thyme

Torn Between Two Leftovers  -  Lasagna or Chili?

How Deep Is Your Pizza  -  The Bee Gees took advantage of the deep dish pizza craze

Candy Man  -  "Who can make you gain weight...by looking at you...give you diabetes and a cavity or two...the Candy Man...oh, the Candy Man can"


Friday, June 29, 2018

Observed Absurdities™ 37 - Almost Completely All


Beloved and I were strolling through NotNew NotArmy and I was struck by a sign we saw.

Well...not literally "struck". There was no physical contact involved, but it did make me wonder if the signmaker involved had a clear understanding of the definition of the word "entire".




Friday, June 22, 2018

The 500th Greatest Song of All Time


On December 9, 2004, Rolling Stone magazine published its list of "The 500 Greatest Songs of All Time".

Wow.

Were they receiving too many complimentary letters to the editor? Because...you know...a subjective list like this was bound to bring out everyone else's opinions to the contrary. Or maybe they were just desperate to come up with some content to fill the seven pages between all the ad copy they publish.



Why do I bring this up now? Well, two reasons:

1.  I just happened to discover the existence of this list while I was looking up something else. (I didn't know about it at the time, not being a subscriber to Rolling Stone.)

2.  I'm desperate to come up with some content.

I feel a little sorry for Number 500 on the list: "More Than a Feeling", by Boston. Sure, you're one of the greatest songs of all time, but you're at the very bottom of the list. If there were only 100 songs on the list, that would be fine, but they stretched this thing out to five hundred farnsworthing songs and you just BARELY got included!

Fun Fact: "More Than a Feeling" is actually a science fiction short story. Consider the first verse...

I looked out this morning and the sun was gone [Immediately sets this up in a post-apocalyptic landscape]
Turned on some music to start my day [Apparently, the writer's synthetic weather app responds to audio input.]
I lost myself in a familiar song [Accidental uploading of his digital essence]
I closed my eyes and I slipped away [Visual interface shut down, resulting in a random dispersion]

No wonder Marianne walked away. The guy's a geek.


Friday, June 15, 2018

#DrPepperPlotlines


What if The Powers That Be in Hollyweird were, like me, obsessed with Dr Pepper?

Dr Pepper Superstar  -  ♫♪ Dr Pepper...Dr Pepper...It's really cool how you cured that leper...Dr Pepper...Superstar...I am amazed how you raised the bar ♪♫

Dr Pepper of Oz  -  "Just take three gulps and belch 'There's no place like home'!"


Dr Pepper Wars: A New Formula  -  The evil Mr Pibb empire tries to overtake the soft drink market. "Dr Pepper, you're our only hope."

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Dr Pepper  -  An inter-school competition turns into a fight for life as Harry almost loses access to the soda fountain.

March of the Dr Pepper  -  A documentary on the making of The Wine of Waco.

The Count of Monte Pepper  -  Revenge never tasted so sweet.

Dr Pepper of the Lost Ark  -  Indiana Jones is in for a surprise when he opens his latest find.

Dr Pepper Runner  -  It's a dystopian future, indeed, when rural folks in Tennesee have to illegally transport their favorite soft drink.

Cool Hand Dr Pepper  -  "What we have here is failure to carbonate."

When Harry Met Dr Pepper  -  "Yes! Yes! Yes!"


Friday, June 8, 2018

What My Phone Thinks I Want to Say


It's called "predictive text" and when you let your phone do the typing, it's amazing / interesting / surprising / embarassing / confounding what gets written:


  • My first attempt to get my first job in a week and I got my own little league of cards.
  • Why would you want to make this happen to us if you don't think we are going to be able to make a good thing?
  • How often is this place in my head and the way to the church is the only way to go?
  • I'm sure you're not going through the rest of your weekend but I hope you're having a wonderful day.
  • If I had to come to the doctor this afternoon, would you like to come over and see what I have?
  • Maybe we should go get back with him or something.
  • Please pray for my recovery from your recovery.
  • Star Wars: I hope you're not feeling good about this
  • Nobody knows what to say about the new version of this one.
  • That's why I'm going through my Twitter with the same thing as a whole lot of the rest of the week.
  • When you're done with the rest of your weekend and you don't need a good day, try to get your stuff together.
  • My ex is a good guy but I'm going straight.