Friday, December 30, 2016

Headlines Wish List - 2017

Things I would love to read as news items in the coming year.

  • Rosemount, Minnesota Has Lowest Snowfall in Recorded History
  • Fred Bassett Permanently Cancelled
  • Everything Old Is New Again: The Resurgence of Classic Rock
  • Washington DC Is Epicenter of Huge Spiritual Revival (and, like, you can tell it's for real because this isn't even an election year)
  • Netflix Is Streaming New Episodes of Firefly (but missing Ron Glass)

  • Ringo Starr Installed as Britain's New Prime Minister
  • Chicago Cubs Win World Series...Again
  • Whatever Happened to Miley Cyrus?
  • Woodchuck Union Publishes Chucked Wood Totals
  • New Weight Tables Released; 20 Over Is the New Perfect

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