Friday, March 27, 2015

We Have Heard the Joyful Sound: "Bieber Saves!"

"When you find yourself in danger, when you're threatened by a stranger, when it looks like you will take a lickin..."

Yes, these are the opening lines of Super Chicken's theme song, and I could sing the whole thing for you...which is a sad, True Truth all on its own...but we may need to rewrite the lyric so particular words rhyme with "Bieber."

Yes, Canada's answer to Britney Spears has been credited for coming to the rescue of a Russian fisherman.

Yes, this is a journalistically-documented story, reported by to Reader's Digest, at least.

Yes, it seems a Russian fisherman was having a bad day. Not only had he not made a significant catch, but he was in the process of being mauled by a bear. ("Oh great...what ELSE could go wrong?!?")

Yes, the bear was causing a fair amount of damage to the wannabe fish-catcher's self esteem, not to mention his torso and legs, when his cell phone rang.

Yes, the fisherman's phone...not the bear's.

The ringtone was Justine Bieber's song, Baby.

Yes, as might be expected, the unexpected noise caused the bear to pause its attack. He listened for a bit, then turned and ran off like he was being chased by a pack of rabid mothers-in-law.

In unrelated news, studies have shown that Russian bears exhibit a high degree of sophistication in musical taste.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Observed Absurdities™ 16 - Happy Trails

Since when has this become acceptable?

Yes...use caution...and cheap ammo...or maybe some punctuation.

"Like shootin' fish inna barrel, Maynard. Yahoo yippity."

Friday, March 13, 2015

A Match Made in Musical Heaven

It's the artwork of Bitstrips, matched with the warposity of my mind, and the result may produce earworms to last for a month as Beloved and I sing out our love.

Friday, March 6, 2015

...And Still Alive To Tell About It

I have been such a reckless daredevil over the years. To hear some people talk nowadays, I never should have survived my childhood.

We rode in the back of Dad's pickup truck...sometimes even sitting on the side instead of hunkered down in the bed.

I spent hours riding my bike through the countryside in the helmet, no heatstroke-avoiding headgear of any kind, no environmentally-friendly water container at my side. [No cellphone to call for help. No warnings about Stranger Danger...]

My parents, particularly my father, spanked me when I was out of line...and sometimes even when I wasn't.

I jumped into piles of hay.

I dug tunnels in the snow.

I climbed trees without adult supervision.

I drank out of the garden hose.

I played, and encouraged others to play, Chubby Bunnies.

I enjoyed salsa from a bowl which had been double-dipped into.

I never used hand sanitizer.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

Yeah...the ladies love us bad boys.