Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Broadband Services

The headline from The Wall Street Journal reads: FOR U.S. CONSUMERS, BROADBAND SERVICE IS SLOW AND EXPENSIVE

Apparently, there are certain churches out there in the vast crazy-quilt we like to call Today's Progressive American Religious Scene that are using all-girl music groups to lead their worship services. Some traditional congregations are still doing the whole "organ" thing. Others have gone to a piano. Still others utilize a kind of rock-pop combo of drums, bass, guitar -- maybe a keyboard or a saxophone, with someone on the side playing harmonica or flute or cowbell.

Well, now the big thing, it seems … the novelty attraction … is to have your worship services led by bands whose members are all female. It's called a broad-band service. You know, the Catholic Church used to have what they called a folk mass, or a youth homily? Well this is called a Broad-band Service.

I've got no problem with this, but it seems that some of the church-going public has been complaining. According to this Wall Street Journal piece, these girl-led services aren't very energetic. In fact, they lean a bit toward the lethargic end of the scale. They just aren't peppy enough for a lot of folks' tastes. Here, read it again: FOR U.S. CONSUMERS, BROADBAND SERVICE IS SLOW AND EXPENSIVE.

Slow -- and expensive. Apparently, they expect you to put more in the offering at these things, too. Or maybe there's now a cover charge for attending the female-led celebrations, I don't know. That seems a bit over-the-top, if you ask me.

You want a broad band to lead your worship? You want only females up front during your song service? Fine. Fine-fine-fine. But pay for it through the regular offerings! Church services have become too much of a spectator sport the way it is. Don't start charging admission! It's not a concert; it's a congregation, for cryin' out loud!

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