False Advertising: A Poem

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale
A tale of a fateful trip
That started at the start, of course,
When Bill said, "Let 'er rip!"

The engines roared; the tires squealed
The air was filled with smoke
The cars lurched forward but soon found
The whole thing was a joke

"A Race Across the Country!"
Said the posters and the pins
But it stopped just as it started
And Bill said, "No one wins!"

The angry crowd arose as one
Demanding satisfaction
To save his life, Bill soon became
A daring man of action

He ran, he jumped, he stole a car
He soon was out of sight
And no one ever heard from him
Not then, nor any night

One would hope a tale like this
Would end with some grand point
But hey, it's made up on the spot
In hopes you'd fill this joint

And yes, you've come, you've read, you've groaned
And, no doubt, now repent
Of ever having opened this
And all the time you've spent