Musical Gas Pumps

Some people will do practically anything to make their work situation more fun.

I am some people.

At the FastStop convenience store/gas station/cigarette emporium I work at part-time, when authorizing the pumping of fuel without the use of a payment card at said pump, my co-workers are satisfied with a quick, bland, and boring "Go ahead, Pump 4," or "Pump 5, you're cleared for inside payment."

To which I say, "Zzzzzz...."

When the mic is in my control, all heaven breaks loose.

(a la "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes")

They

Asked me how I knew

You were on Pump 2

Ohhhhhhh

I of course replied

When you come inside

To pay me what is due

(Toni Basil's "Hey Mickey")

Hey Pump 9

You're so fine

See you in the checkout line

Pump 9!

Oooooh Pump 9!

("Cheek to Cheek" and in a French accent)

Seven

You're on Pump 7

Please come inside to pay when you are done

To drive away would not be too much fun

The rest of your life would be spent on the run

("Fun Fun Fun")

And we'll have

Fun on Pump 1

If you come inside to pay

("Goodnight Sweetheart")

Hello Pump 12 well it's time for fuel

Doo doo-n-doo doo

You chose FastStop which proves that you're no fool

Doo doo-n-doo

I'd hate to chase you down

Just for some dough

So come inside

To pay

Before you go

("Let It Snow")

Ohhhhhhh

The weather at Pump 3 is frightful

But you chose FastStop, that's delightful

I've got one more thing to say

Don't forget

To come in-

Side to pay