Black Friday Blues

This may come as a shock
But back at Plymouth Rock
The Pilgrims never strolled through shopping malls
Instead of a season of giving
They scratched out a meager living
And spent their evenings cleaning oxen stalls
In praise of them paying their dues
To bargain shop, I refuse
I'll just sing the bleak, Black Friday Blues

Instead of brotherly love
Today, folks scream and shove
Because they want that "Buy One, Get One Free"
They camp all night at the store
To grab what they're lusting for
And to claim their Right to everything they can see
Yeah, they argue and kick and bruise
But not me; no, I'd rather choose
To sing the low-down, nasty, bleak Black Friday Blues

I know some folks long for the thrill
To stalk and pounce and kill
But not me; this guy will never know why
People don't stay home and chill

All the way from Key West to Nome
Folks gather at home, sweet home
Thankful for their food, family, and friends
And then, with blinding speed
Motivated by covetous greed
The sales begin and all thought of thankfulness ends
Well, by now you know my views
So this shouldn't be breaking news
I'll just sing the bleak, Black Friday Blues

I'll sing the low-down...
Nitty gritty, stuck in the city
Used to be funny, but now it's not pretty
The low-down
Nasty
Bleak Black Friday Blues