Friday, November 24, 2017

Black Friday Blues


This may come as a shock
But back at Plymouth Rock
The Pilgrims never strolled through shopping malls
Instead of a season of giving
They scratched out a meager living
And spent their evenings cleaning oxen stalls
In praise of them paying their dues
To bargain shop, I refuse
I'll just sing the bleak, Black Friday Blues

Instead of brotherly love
Today, folks scream and shove
Because they want that "Buy One, Get One Free"
They camp all night at the store
To grab what they're lusting for
And to claim their Right to everything they can see
Yeah, they argue and kick and bruise
But not me; no, I'd rather choose
To sing the low-down, nasty, bleak Black Friday Blues

I know some folks long for the thrill
To stalk and pounce and kill
But not me; this guy will never know why
People don't stay home and chill

All the way from Key West to Nome
Folks gather at home, sweet home
Thankful for their food, family, and friends
And then, with blinding speed
Motivated by covetous greed
The sales begin and all thought of thankfulness ends
Well, by now you know my views
So this shouldn't be breaking news
I'll just sing the bleak, Black Friday Blues

I'll sing the low-down...
Nitty gritty, stuck in the city
Used to be funny, but now it's not pretty
The low-down
Nasty
Bleak Black Friday Blues





Friday, November 17, 2017

Name a Song That...Vol. III


Still working my way down a list of prompts and remembering my disc jockey days with fondness.




A song that played at your wedding

A song you would sing a duet with on karaoke

A song from the year you were born

A song that makes you think about life

A favorite song with a person's name in the title (Note: Changed this to "Debbie" and sang it to Beloved in our wedding)

Friday, November 10, 2017

My Favorite Mission Trip Story


When leading a group of teenagers on a trip to a country that's well-known for its fertility gods, there are certain preparatory instructions one must relate:

  • Talking about cross-cultural sensitivity
  • Reminding the teens that respect for another country's culture doesn't necessarily mean we agree with it or think it's right
  • Begging them not to giggle and point and make a scene


As prepared as we could be, we four adults and however many teenagers flew to Montego Bay, Jamaica, schlepped our luggage through customs, piled into a small transit bus/van/tin can, and drove several hours through the Dry Harbour Mountains to Kingston.

The mood was light. We were filled with anticipation for what God had in store for us. Many animated conversations were overlapping throughout the vehicle.

While slowly making our way on the narrow, winding, mountain "road", we passed by a trailside stand that, instead of selling papaya nectar and coconuts carved to look like monkey-heads, was selling several versions of the local male fertility god, all with very prominent ...um...organs of gender.

To give our teens the credit due them, nobody went crazy or laughed or screamed. In fact, quite the opposite happened. They stopped their conversations and did their best to be mature and discreet.

The thing is...one of the adult leaders, who is short and blond and looks so much like Beloved that she is called BelovedBookend, wasn't looking out the window at the time. She was engrossed in her conversation with her seatmate, and just as the rest of the van fell silent, she loudly effused, "Cool!"

THAT'S when the vehicle windows were blown out by the force of our laughter.

Friday, November 3, 2017

Name a Song That...Vol. II


Spinnin' all the platters that matter from my mighty stacks of wax. Time to get down with the big sound. These are the grooves that move, baybay!




A song to drive to

A song that makes you happy

A song that makes you sad

A song you never get tired of

One of your favorite 80's songs