Friday, July 24, 2015

Almost the Truthlets, the Ninth

Belly up to the bar, friends. Let me pour you a large glass of what you've been missing if you're not plugged in to the Almost the Truth Publishing FaceBook page.

Frankly, my dear, I don't give a refund.

This status update is a lie.

Ain’t no sunshine when it’s night. Seldom dark during the day. Ain’t no sunshine when it’s night, and that’s not good for my sight. Guess I’ll just see in the day.

April 15…wasn’t there something important I was supposed to do today? Oh well…I’ll think of it tomorrow.

Look! I can tour farther. (Punny #StarWars reference)

I’m all about the bass…and the trout…and the walleye.

Indiana Jones, having gone vegan, at a backyard gathering of friends: “Steaks. Why did it have to be steaks?”

At what point in my past did I ever do anything so horrible as to deserve the burden of meatless lasagna?

Sittin’ on the dock of the bay, praying these splinters aren’t here to stay…

Don’t know whyyyyyy there’s no sun up in the skyyyyy…oh…it’s nighttime.

As the rabbi empty-handedly said to the priest on Easter, “Frankly, my peer, I don’t give a ham.”

Fie…wordakeen…udda four ehhhhhhhhhhfs…nahkween…nahdook…nahprints…

For every action, there’s an equal and…no…a doubled and opposite misinterpretation.

Said one Looney Tunes gladiator to another, "You got Fudd on your mace, you big disgrace."

Some people think Arby’s. Others contemplate malnourished insects tended to by Noah: Ark Thin Bees.

The love of algebra is the square root of all evil.

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